E.... C.... (godiva@kublai.com)
Tue, 12 May 1998 15:56:46 -0400
Not that I was supposed to take that seriously or anything, but as for that
comment about willing math geeks figuring out the time to watch the entire
series, It would take exactly 17 hours, 13 minutes, 40 seconds. Going back to
back without any interruptions at all. It just shows how short the series was
when you consider that it would take roughly 29 hours 46 minutes to read
Anna Karenina. Stash said something about too much time on their hands...
--Eavan
On Tue, May 12, 1998 at 10:44:55PM +1000, christopher nolan wrote:
> HI
>
> I agree with every word you say Stash
> except one. Using the Spice Girls tape
> to tie up your room mate. I don't object to you tieing your room mate up but
> using a Spice Girls tape is wrong. (Because I like them but we won't start
> that again) Anyway masking tape works better and don't ask me how i know
> that that.
>
> Bye
> chris
>
>
>
> Stash's
> >>Step-by-step Guide to Becoming a PG Fan.
> >> 1. *Accidentally* remove the tv aerial so your roommate can only watch
> >>videos.
> >> 2. In a bizarre full moon ritual, burn all videos except PG ones.
> >>However DO NOT burn her Spice Girls video. (of course she has one)
> >>You'll need it later.
> >> 3. Pull out that Spice Girls video (told you) and literally *pull out*
> >>the ribbons of tape from the plastic case. Cut the tape into long
> >>rope-like lengths. (Note: Colin's bear-kife could come in handy here)
> >> 4. While she is sleeping or otherwise incapicitated (perhaps alcohol
> >>or illict drugs will come in handy here if she's a light sleeper), tie
> >>her to her bed using strands of Spice Girls video.
> >> 5. Position her head towards TV, wake her up by humming PG theme
> >>full-bore into her ear, gaffer tape her mouth shut and press *play* on
> >>VCR: PG episode one. Only about 20 hours to go! (invitation to willing
> >>geek with time on hands to do the maths and work out exactly how many
> >>hours)
> >> 6. It's probably best to leave the room, only returning when it's time
> >>to change tapes. It can be disturbing to watch. (her, not the show,
> >>fools)
> >> 7. As the final moments of TAC play out on the screen, return to
> >>witness a wonderous new person: A PG fan.
> >> 8. Accept her undying gratitude.
> >> 9. Sign her up to the PGML, where she'll meet many PG fans *created* in
> >>the same way.
> >>
> >>Stash, fondly remembering her conversion to PG. Remember? Hell, the
> >>lawsuit is still pending.
> >>
> >>-Liisa!
>
>
>
> --
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-- "Emergency!" Sgiggs screamed, ejecting himself from the tub like it was a burning car. "Dial 'one'! Get room service! Code red!" Stiggs was on the phone immediately, ordering more rose blossoms, because, according to him, the ones floating in the tub had suddenly lost their smell. "I demand smell," he shrilled. "I expecting total uninterrupted smell from these f*cking roses."Unfortunately, the service captain didn't realize that the Stiggs situation involved fifty roses. "What am I going to do with this?" Stiggs sneered at the weaseling hotel goon when he appeared at our door holding a single flower floating in a brandy glass. Stiggs's tirade was great. "Do you see this bathtub? Do you notice any difference between the size of the tub and the size of that spindly wad of petals in your hand? I need total bath coverage. I need a completely solid layer of roses all around me like puffing factories of smell, attacking me with their smell and power-ramming big stinking concentrations of rose odor up my nostrils until I'm wasted with pleasure." It wasn't long before we got so dissatisfied with this incompetence that we bolted. -- The Utterly Monstrous, Mind-Roasting Summer of O.C. and Stiggs, National Lampoon, October 1982
-- T H E P R E S S G A N G M A I L I N G L I S T By default, pressing 'reply' will send mail back to the list, not to the author of the message you're replying to. To unsubscribe e-mail: pressgang-unsubscribe@lists.yoyo.org For additional commands, e-mail: pressgang-help@lists.yoyo.org
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