Constance Lever-Tracy (socl.n.ss@psy1.ssn.flinders.edu.au)
Tue, 2 Jun 1998 16:30:16 +0000
>Okay all, hyper-efficient Murray (the same one who owes you all an FAQ
>and a demog list post) has managed to get the file of that student mag
>article for y'all today. I know there used to be a certain Kb-age over
>which the list server would refuse to send out attachments, so if this
>doesn't go through, I will cut and paste the article into a post this
>evening (ie in about 8 hours).
Unfortunatly it doesn't look like it came through Murry. I've just
got a blank page .
>Thanks are due to Simon Collins, the editor of Curtin uni's "Grok"
>magazine, for getting back to me so soon.
>Fingers crossed this works,
>Murray,
>still cool calm and collected despite having only done the title page
>and stolen a few of his old slides for a talk he's giving tomorrow (god
>that guy has problems :) )
ah the wonders of being a student toaly confident and living by the skin of our
teath.
Natacha
___________________________________________________________________
Murray Head <muzza@omen.net.au> http://www.omen.net.au/~muzza/
Also at mhead@anhb.uwa.edu.au (Anatomy & Human Biology, UWA)
Australasian Society for Human Biology http://anhb.uwa.edu.au/ASHB/
"I invented calm - I only have a pulse on weekends"
-Steven Moffat (from the TV series Press Gang)
------
_7 # =04 =01 .o 6=E6 -o 4 M=
4 M 4M 4M 4M =0E 4[ J 4=A5 4=A5 4=A5 4=A5 4_ 41 =
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=07 6_ 6_ 6=BA , 6_ 6_ 6_ 6_ 6_ 6_ It is a proven=
fact that television can make you believe that the impossible is possible.=
But when it makes out that high school is a great place to be filled with=
action, adventure, romance, abortions, drug addictions (and thatOs only i=
n year nine) I get mad, I get angry and I say show me the proof that this h=
appens in reality.
Ladies and Gentlemen, television brought me up to believe that the world wa=
s a happy place and I accepted that. That is, until I entered High School, =
upon which it turned around and spat me in the face with the grim reality t=
hat High School was a battlefield.
A recent survey (well, actually it was just me asking a few friends), revea=
led that the majority of the population were also deluded when they starte=
d High School. They couldnOt figure out why there were no full length locke=
rs (you know the kind that you could hide in), there werenOt any free perio=
ds and there certainly werenOt any initiation rites. Mind you, with the pro=
spect of getting your head shoved down a toilet whilst Year 12Os filled you=
r underwear with shaving cream as you yodelled the DivinylOs "I touch mysel=
fO, I think IOm kind of glad I missed out.
Okay, sure I might be taking this a bit far, we all know that television is=
a fictional place where good always prevails and everyone is good at sport=
, surely it doesnOt matter if it bends the truth occasionally? =
Of course it matters! Look people, weOre not just talking a few irrelevant =
errors every now and then. WeOre talking full-scale, big-time deception, wi=
th the five most popular misconceptions including:
* Student Councillors actually have a say in the running of the school.
* The school magazine is a widely read publication
* Enemies can become friends in five days
* Canteen food is edible
* There is no such thing as school uniform (N/A for Grange Hill)
And thatOs without even mentioning those great 80Os high school flicks. The=
Breakfast Club, Ferris BuellerOs Day Off, Revenge of the Nerds =D1 oh for =
the days when a geek could submerge his face in two ginormous breasts whils=
t his computer watch wrecks havoc on a JockOs alarm clock causing him to be=
late for the football grand final causing them to lose and destroying the =
moral of the sports team and cheerleading squad.
And can I just ask what exactly is the deal with the high school prom? Why =
is it that in every single series there comes a time when halfway through t=
he dance the school nerd starts busting a move on the dance floor that inco=
rporates both the macarena and the box step. All of sudden the cool kids go=
OwowO, and start imitating him. I donOt know about you, but every time I t=
ry something like that I receive dodgy looks from all directions followed =
by my friends trying to ditch me.
But nevertheless I still dreamed of the perfect school. I imagined a school=
in which even an unfit girl with a big fringe (IOm talking king-sized prop=
ortions) could excel and become School President, Homecoming Queen and goll=
y gosh, just an all round great girl. No I didnOt, not really. I wanted to=
see some interesting characters go to school. Who else would like to see t=
he arrival of the Devil Worshipper who made the religious education teacher=
cry? What about the psychic student who can accurately predict exam questi=
ons and sells them to fellow classmates? And then of course you have your w=
itches, hypnotists, necrophiliacs =D1 thatOd certainly make for an interest=
ing episode. =
Yet despite all my whinging, IOm a secret High School drama addict. I tell =
you, if anyone taped over my Press Gang tape IOm afraid I would turn into a=
n extraordinarily introverted individual, wandering the streets of Perth wi=
th a knife in my pocket. IOd be the type of person who reads the White Page=
s and ...thinks about things. IOd be the type of person who (stop it, youOl=
l have them thinking youOre the Claremont Serial Killer soon). =
So join me if you will on a trip back in time to visit your adolescence. Wa=
lk the hallways with me as we enter the classroom of youth to be taught les=
sons on life and remember =D1 there is a moral at the end of every episode=
. =
DEGRASSI JUNIOR AND SENIOR HIGH
Yes sirree, Degrassi is officially the greatest high school program ever ma=
de. This was the only show in which every storyline was told entirely from =
a youth perspective. And what storylines they were. In one season the show =
covered such issues as abortion, teenage pregnancy, drugs, alcohol addictio=
n, anorexia, peer pressure, epilepsy, racial stereotyping and death. But wh=
at truly set this show apart from others was not the crimped hair, nor its =
unhealthy obsession with fluorescent pink socks over sky blue leggings. Deg=
rassi managed to talk frankly about real issues that affected teenagers wit=
hout enforcing a moral stand onto the viewers. =
Degrassi broke the mould of stereotypical high school programs. Instead of =
focusing on six characters who were beautiful and well-off, the show looked=
closely at the lives of over 20 different characters in various years. The=
y had acne, some were overweight, many had bad hair days and it was this ty=
pe of realism that attracted such a large loyal following. We grew up with =
these people, everyone could find at least one character to identify with. =
They were our friends and were faced with the same adolescent dilemmas. =
And then of course there was Joey Jeremiah. Resident loud mouthed prankster=
and major bo-hunk despite his criminal hat and oh, that sexual tension bet=
ween Joey and Caitlin. Only one other show had managed to equal such a leve=
l of intensity, but more on Spike and Lynda later. =
Each and every episode of Degrassi contained many a memorable moment, who c=
ould forget the OIf you vote for me IOll kiss youO class president campaign=
? Television doesnOt get much better than OAll the way with Stephanie Kaye=
O complete with teased hair, blue eye-shadow and lycra a go go. And then th=
ere was Miss AviaryOs lesbian tendencies, SpikeOs child and EricaOs abortio=
n. You had Arthur ringing up a radio sex expert for advice on wet dreams, t=
he arrival of sexy Simon Ohe used to be a modelO, ClaudeOs suicide and Whee=
lsO descent into bastard-dom.
But nothing, nothing, beats the formation of the greatest high school band =
in known history =D1 The Zit Remedy, O...EverybodyOs got something theyOll =
never give up. EverybodyOs got something theyOll take your money, and never=
give up." Okay so the lyrics are a bit dodgy, but IOm telling you, this is=
the song you should be voting for in the hottest 100 of all time.
PRESS GANG=0BAaah, Press Gang. The only show thatOs right up there with Deg=
rassi as one of the all time greatest series. Okay, so strictly speaking th=
is is not a high school program. But it does deal with high school students=
running a newspaper out of class time and itOs filled with snappy one line=
rs and poignant poisonous remarks so cut me some slack. =
Spike and Lynda, need I say more? No. But I will anyway. The sexual tension=
between these two characters was stronger than that between Dick Tracy and=
Breathless Mahony, stronger than that between annoying Ross and Rachel , =
stronger than Bill and Monica, but I digress.
Lynda was my idol. She was intelligent, hot headed and managed to simultane=
ously be a great friend and a mega-bitch in between chasing stories and sol=
ving crimes. Lynda inspired me to become a journalist and was the catalyst =
for my brief obsession for blazers which were to be worn at all times, even=
in summer. Meanwhile Spike was the epitome of hip with snappy one liners c=
oming out of every orifice of his body whilst relentlessly pursuing his bel=
oved Lynda: OIOd drink her bath waterO.
And then thereOs the antics of Sarah, Kenny, Frazz, Sam and Colin. Aaah, Co=
lin. How can you not love a guy who tries to sell the school to a group of =
Arabs. A guy who as acting editor declares feature articles are to be no lo=
nger than twelve sentences. A guy who goes to a manOs funeral dressed as a =
rabbit.
Forget who shot JR, the biggest cliff hanger in television was during the s=
iege at the newsroom when an armed hostage held Spike, Lynda, Sarah, Kenny =
and Colin hostage. We knew someone was going to die but who? Please, let it=
be Sarah. Oh no! HeOs let the others go but is keeping Lynda and Spike. A =
gun shot! SomeoneOs dead! Who is it? Who is it? Damn those credits! IOve ch=
ewed my nails down to the cuticles! Originally this episode was a means by =
which to kill Spike off. But luckily Dexter and his enormous lips decided t=
o continue with the series.
With so many brilliant episodes its hard to single out the best and not tur=
n this article into a six thousand word essay. You could steal my Thom York=
e photo and melt my Synthesiser Sound Machine record and still I could not =
single out a favourite Press Gang episode. But certainly some of the greate=
st episodes were those that centred around the newsroom and focused on char=
acter interaction and dialogue. My entire knowledge of insults during lower=
high school was based entirely on Press Gang. with comments such as OIOd h=
ave more fun with a pencil stuck in my eyeO, Ohe gave me a look that would =
pop your acneO, okay, theyOre a bit lame now, but when youOre thirteen the=
yOre venomous.
HEARTBREAK HIGH=0BOccasionally dodgy Australian television series currentl=
y set in the fictitious grounds of Hartley Heights High (love that allitera=
tion).
Series recently rose in popularity due to (a) appearance ABC to give it cre=
dibility and, (b) appearance on the show of Callan Mulvey, current bo-hunk =
of any self respecting 15 year old.
Although it ultimately sticks to depicting reality, occasionally the show i=
ncorporates several of Aaron Spellings TV ideals, in that storylines are al=
lowed to meander and be taken off to an implausible tangent. =
Example number one: At the start of the school year, Drazic was illiterate.=
Two months later he miraculously has been able to cover eighteen years of =
reading and writing and is now up to speed with the rest of his class. Real=
istic television? I think not.
Example number two: Anita is badly injured after a horrific car crash in wh=
ich she was not wearing a seat belt. SheOs in a coma yet in half an hour wa=
kes up and makes a full recovery with no facial scars. If only Princess Dia=
na was that lucky.
Furthermore, has anyone else noticed that itOs permanently summer at Hartle=
y Heights? Either theyOre having some severe time warp problems or its furt=
her proof of global warming. =
Yet the show is occasionally watchable. Highlight of the series would have =
to include KatarinaOs dancing =D1 almost as funny as the entire series of S=
outhpark, and Drazic slagging off RyanOs rugby mate. Simply because itOs th=
e only anti-sport sentiment on television amidst a nation obsessed with foo=
tball, rugby, soccer, tennis, basketball, netball etc.
And please, please! We want less of NickiOs singing. She makes the Zit Reme=
dy look like Radiohead.
GRANGE HILL
Longest running high school drama on television, has been going since the e=
arly seventies. Only high school drama on television that had school unifor=
ms, now thatOs more like it. Critics praised itOs gritty realism, was the c=
losest England could get to a Degrassi lookalike. Brilliant. Top points for=
itOs interpretation of Grease- the musical.
BEVERLY HILLS 90210.
Shudder. Too much has been written about this rancid show as it is. One day=
Aaron Spelling, one day IOll get my revenge.
THE BIZ
Bizarre British programme set in a performing arts high school in which the=
plot would be interrupted sporadically with musical numbers. Starred Paul =
Nicholls and his hairy chest. The show was based around kids with talent, i=
ronically the actors they hired had none. 'Nuff said.
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